Bad Gnus' Spring Season Up in Smoke; Ends on a High

It shouldn't be too surprising considering this just happened 5 weeks ago... However, the Bad Gnus had two very different games this week. On Monday, the Gnus dropped a squeaker to the Hanks, 22-1. The very next night, the beatee was doing the beating. Don't Panic was on the bitch end of a pent-up slapping, 26-6. There were many factors that could have contributed to the quite divergent results.

*Monday... No Howard, no John; Tuesday... No Pete

*Monday... The team used either Pete's nicely labeled bat or Erik's lead pipe; Tuesday... Kirk busted out a new expensive stick

*Monday... Fans drinking beer; Tuesday... Fans drinking Bocce Balls

*Monday... Opponents looked liked old men, played like it was MLB old-timers game; Tuesday... Opponents looked like roadies on the Journey tour, played like park-day at the retirement home.

I think the answer may land more in the last observation.

I don't want to spend too much time on that first game. It all seems a little foggy. It could be the GHB an unnamed Gnu picked up in Key West and slipped into my Sierra Nevada so I didn't remember his at bats. Next time, please don't put my boxers on backward. If I wake up in the middle of the night and want to go "through the gate" and not "over the fence", I end up wetting myself.

I do recall an ugly start of the game. The Bad Gnus were down 15-0 after the first inning. The Hanks scored 15 runs without the benefit of any errors! I think we only made a couple of errors the entire game. Those fogies can rake!

Don't Panic rolled into Arden Park as the big, fat slumpbuster the Gnus needed. I can't be too hard on those hippies as one of them did reach into his hemp man-purse and pull out my missing glove. They unfortunately didn't take the missing bat the same night as they were sure it wouldn't light.

Regarding the game, it went as you might guess... we hit a lot, they made a bunch of errors... what a long, strange trip it's been. The game's outcome was never in doubt. There was much more suspense playing a game of "before or after gametime" as Don't Panic batters approached the plate. Question... when did he last fire up the giggle weed? I don't think Don't Panic will win another game until someone has to play them at 4:20 some Tuesday.

The Newcastle Player of the Game was pretty sticky this week. Keith played like jah, mon! Burning one to the basketball court and smoking rockets all over the grass. He might have been 5 for 5. I didn't see his last at bat, so I'm just going to assume it was a base hit. On most nights, that would have been enough for Keith to Bogart the NPOG. This week, the honor has to go to Kirk. Finally, a Gnu stepped up and laid down some hard earned green on a rip-stick. So far, the offense has been sparked up by this new weapon of choice. Kirk seems to always be getting hits at the plate and taking hits away in the field. I don't remember how many hits he had Tuesday, but the number was quite high. So a big thanks and congrats to Kirk on taking home this week's Newcastle Player of the Game.

This week concluded the Spring Season or Spring Training as veteren Bad Gnus call it. Next week is the first game of the season and the next week of the rest of our lives. Let's make them both great... Peace, love and happiness, brah...

Note: Most of the last few paragraphs were written while listening to Bob Marley and surrounded by burning candles and incense...