Double The Softball, Double the Fun?

That was the hope this week as the Bad Gnus headed into the week in first place and with a perfect record. A lot of great things come in twos. A pair of wins this week could make the top 5. It would push the Bad Gnus much closer to the championship and serve as notice that these guys weren't just the laid back dudes in the cool tie dye who drink only good beer.

Game 1 was against the Hanks. The Hanks who have won 35 championships at Arden Park in the last 40 years with much the same roster. They are always a tough win with their consistent singles hitting, errorless defense and a pitcher who's balls hang just a little longer in the air than younger pitchers. Now I'll admit I have been in a few too many locker rooms with old guys. From what I can tell either from 70 years of gravity or the courage it took to take on the Krauts in WWII (the Big One), old guys balls tend to hang low. Not this guy's. They seem to never come down.

The one thing you don't want when playing the Hanks is three outfielders. Those old guys can place their singles whereever they please. They rain more singles on the grass than PacMan Jones at stripper picnic. It was a bad night to be missing Pete & John (involved in some civil ceremony in Hawaii), Sean (hangover), Kevin (got lost) and Appleton (wrist tendinitis and blurry vision) leaving us with only 9 players. That's when we got a boost from the youngest Gnu and the oldest of Bad Gnus 2, the Next Generation. That's right... Big Sexy's nephew himself, Teen Sexy made his first appearance of the summer season behind the plate. Teen Sexy has arrived on the scene just this past summer. The formerly shy, reserved boy has grown to nearly 6 feet, let his hair get all bushy like the kids do, has a deep tan and a throng of girls following him whereever he goes. He makes an Uncle proud...

As for the game, four outfielders or not, the Hanks put up 5 in the top of the first on a bunch of singles and some uncharacteristically misplayed grounders. That was all they would need. The Gnus pulled to within 5-2, but never got much closer, losing 9-3. The game did have some highlights, but the Gnus bats never consistently hit the changeup from Highballs McGee. The Gnus almost turned a third to second to first double play on a ground ball. That would've be cool. A few people did has multiple hits including Clayton, Mike, Keith and Greg (I think). Sorry if I missed any of you.

That made Game 2 versus Ahern construction nearly a must-win to keep the championship hopes alive. Things looked promising at the start as not only did 11 Gnus show up before the game started, but there were TWO ice chests ready for the post game celebration. Mike has played a couple of times on the Ahern team and would really like to hand the defending league champions a loss.

The first inning started with a bang as Mike drilled a ball over the left fielder and rounded the bases for a three run home run. He didn't touch either first or third base, but Ahern was too stunned to notice. That gave them a 3-0 until the home team responded with two solo home runs of their own and the homerun derby was on. In the second, the Bad Gnus were unable to keep up the dingers coming while Ahern continued their hitting barrage to give them a 6-3 lead they would not relinquish. The Gnus pulled within 7-5 at one time and played solid defense througout, but in the end, they didn't have the bats to keep up with the champs. Ahern wins the second game of the double header 11-7.

The committee had no problem giving the Newcastle Player of the Week to himself. Mike was 5 X 6 in the two games with a homerun and a triple. He also nearly started an infield triple play. Through Ichiro's interpreter after the game, the Big Sexy had this to say, "When traveling through the forest of softball, it is important to remember that the roots of the trees in the dirt and sweet fruit on the branches are from the same organism. If the songbird chooses to sit on it's branches, harmony will spread from the tree throughout the forest and joy will be plentiful." Enjoy the Asahi, Mike.

Big ups to Ted who played with a gnarly looking index finger and Bill who played with himself. Despite the two losses this week, the Bad Gnus played formidable opponents well and looked good doing it. There were many throw back shirts last night... I guess there were a couple of Gnus who didn't just pick up the shirt off the floor from the night before and throw it back on.

Next week is the big revenge game against Don't Panic, Tuesday at 6:00. Don't Panic's victory over the Gnus in May was their first since prior to Herr Bush's Reign of Terror and has been the talk of Arden Park softball for a couple of months. You know they have this game circled on their calendar. Guess what, Ponytails, I have it circled too!