A Letter from the Nixon Cabin Bear

First off, I am not the godless killing machine that some talk show hosts make me out to be. I'm a herbovoir. Heck, as a Californian, I'm more into veggies than BBQ'd man-meat. Just keep putting your trash out in the open and I won't have to destroy anything to get those tasty leftovers. Hanging by the Nixon's cabin, I get all sorts of healthy leftovers. Those people eat nothing but salads and tofu. I've dropped 50 pounds since I relocated from outside Sally Musso's cabin and moved to North Tahoe.

I'm looking forward to all of you guys coming up to join me. In fact, even if you haven't said you are coming up yet, feel free to come up just for the day. We have a lot of fun events planned from the bear beer golf tourneyment on Saturday morning to the "bare" midnight run through the woods. Don't worry, no cameras will be allowed.

A little word of warning... I hope that Bill Moebs is not planning on attending. Yogi has a can of whupp-ass he is planning on opening if he sees him. Apparently, Yogi didn't take too kindly to how much attention Bill paid to Cindy Bear's nether-regions last time he was in the woods. It was one joke after another about looking in her pic-a-nica basket, putting out her forest fire down below and climbing his sturdy pine.

Here's the plan for this weekend... Mike is going up early on Friday. His phone number is 548-8587. Give him a call at any time and he will give you directions to the cabin. There is plenty of room for anyone to bunk down and there is plenty of beer to quench your summer thirst. Mike is going to get a keg of good beer and buy some munchies and food for a bbq around on Saturday night. This entire vacation will be yours for the low cost of $40 per human. Make sure to pay Mike when you get a chance. If you are going up on Friday, bring a bike. If you can't bring a bike you can rent one. Either way, I here those bipeds are going to ride up to a sweet riverside drinking establishment.I hope to see you all this coming weekend, July 20-22. I promise I will not bite and leave a mark. I don't promise that I will not call my buddies the skunk, raccoon and porcupine to laugh at your asses as we eat all of your leftover tri-tip as your are "sleeping" on the deck.

Party on!!!