Wednesday, June 24, 2009

BOOM!


That was the one word exclamation point that the WIN Financial pitcher dropped loudly on the Bad Gnus in the top of the 7th inning Monday night as soon as he hit it. It exemplified just about everything about that game. That ball was absolutely smoked. It flew well over Howard's head. WIN hit more balls hard than I have ever seen at Arden Park. Not since Clayton took a knee to the groin during a Concert in the Park have balls been struck so squarely in this neighborhood.

But more telling, who yells"Boom!" when they hit the ball? A tool, that's who. This team is an all-star team of douchebaggery. There are so many things about them that I dislike. I don't mean that from the grouchy old man vista that I currently peer the world through. Bros like this have existed since the beginning of time. I've hated these clowns all my life.

WIN F is a perfect charicature of the 21st Century Bro. Sleeveless shirts? Check. Tattoos? Check. Backward hats? Check. Soul patches? Check? Raised pick up trucks? Check. One of my favorite moments of WIN-hating for me was watching two of them drive off in the raised-up, huge pick up trucks that hid their infant-sized twig and berries. If I had to guess what these knuckleheads drove around in, I would've said Hummer, but this would have been a close second. I didn't get a close enough look, but I bet there was a Nor Cal sticker in the window that replaced the Calvin pissing window sticker that was the Bro sticker for the 90's. I also enjoyed watching one of their gals wearing high heels and smoking a cig down the first base line while watching her man perform. She had to leave early, surely to get a good spot on the pole that evening. Can't wait till all the big tippers leave, can you Kayli.

About the game, it was a suck sandwich. The Bad Gnus stranded runner after runner in the first four innings. After a slow start to the WIN F bats, they started running Howard and Keith all over the tennis courts. The score was 15-2 after 4 innings. The game did seem to be over. However, the Bad Gnus always are a threat to run off a Bad Gnus inning. They put together two straight solid innings as everyone was getting on base up and down the order. After 6 innings, the score was 15-12.
There's actually a bit more to that. Looking back, some bad coaching may have hurt our chances. It was with two outs in the 5th with a runner on third, down 15-12 when the umpire said there was less than a minute left. I told Stuart to just swing at the first pitch where ever it was. If he got on and scored the run from third, we go for the win. If he gets out, we get another inning. Stuart has been pretty automatic this year with the bat and I should have had him take his time, do his thing and try to win it there. Stuart flew out, giving us another inning. That didn't turn out so well. WIN F punished the ball in the 7th, turning the game into a 24-12 route. So much for our streak of one run losses.

The Arden Park drug testing results have been returned. Surpisingly, only 3 WIN F players had artificial testosterone in their system. However, 7 had traces of Red Bull, 6 had evidence of Valtrex, 3 have been hitting the hippie lettuce and 1 had GHB. Must've had a sip of his date's vodka-cran the previous night. On the other side of the fence, the Bad Gnus has 10 with readable BAC's, 2 people with evidence of FloMax in the system and 1 with some nasty, gluten free beer in his system.
Next up, we welcome the newest team to the park. The generic "Softball Team". I might not have much to say there. Check back and find out.

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